Posimicity = a state of being when one is both positive and optimistic
Yes... I made this word up. But I like. So it works.
The most intriguing part of the whole experience was gauging my own reaction to photos of myself that were 6-8 years old. What did I think of myself? If you are like me, you have that photo framed or pinned up somewhere in your house. You know, that one that you love the way you look in. Where your eyes are bright, your smiling and you radiate youthful exuberance. The picture we look at and think... I wish I could look like that again. Well, I am going to share mine with you all...
I remember the day - it was senior year in high school - at Girls State. When Alanna, Alice and myself took Ellensburg by storm. Or something like that. I have had this picture on my bulletin board for what seems like forever. Truthfully, its only been 8 years. What strikes me most about this picture is my reaction to it now. My sister saw it last weekend and commented how long and lean I looked. Do I remember ever feeling long and lean? Nope. Not at all. I wish I could have seen myself then through my eyes now. Because, rather than beating myself up for needing to lose 10 more pounds, and be a step faster on the basketball court, I would have embraced the following things about myself: My abililty to run a 7 minute mile; my ability to bench press my body weight (which was 160 at the time); the lack of bra bulge; the fact that I could see every muscle in my quadricep; and lastly, the minimal belly fat around my midsection. Ahhhh. Wasn't life a bit better when we were young and carefree?
Instead, I distinctly recall hating my body. It was NEVER good enough; and as such, I thought that I was never good enough. In the last 8 years, I have learned a lot. A big life lesson is that negativity breeds negativity. Its like a cancer of your mind, heart and soul. You need to be positive, otherwise, what else is there? I have a quote that I try to keep foremost in my mind when things get rough, or I start to get down on myself:
It's so simple, and so true. Alice was my best friend for years throughout and after high school. She has since passed on to a better place in the universe, but I have held on to single piece of paper that used to hang on the inside of our shared basketball locker since sophomore year. I think she must have gotten it from seminary or something -- where ever it came from, it is faded piece of paper with edges that have gotten fuzzy over the years. It has a simple statement: Think a good day, Plan a good day, HAVE a good day. Each morning I try to embrace these words. Its reassuring to my subconscious. I convince myself that it will be a good day, and most of the time it is. There are mornings when I am too rushed to do this, and I feel like those are the days when get started on the wrong foot and everything goies downhill from there. I need to take these words, this mantra, and extend it to my fitness and weight goals. And to myself. A simple, 'You CAN do this. You WILL succeed,' can have a transforming affect. Its crucial to know that you are on your side. If I don't believe in me, who else will?!
"Every thought is a seed. If you plant crab apples, don't plan on
harvesting Golden Delicious." ~ Bill Meyer
How about you all? What do you do to combat the bad self talk and poor body image issues?Are there things you could change that would improve your outlook on you?